It’s very easy to come up with a list of basic things about myself. My favourite colour is purple, my hobbies are reading and writing, I like pasta. But when we are asked to think of 5 things that aren’t so basic, we really have to pause and think deeply about ourselves. That’s why I really like today’s topic.
1) I Get Anxiety & Panic Attacks
I have mentioned in a previous post that I get panic attacks. What I have not blogged about before is the fact that I get anxious really easily. I don’t know if it had anything to do with the kind of messy childhood I had but I get very anxious when I hear loud noises or when people shout. My heart will start to speed up and I will start to breathe faster and get really scared. It does affect me personally. It’s not a good feeling basically. So I get anxiety attacks.
2) I Have A Specific Bed Time Routine
I have a very specific and lengthy bed time routine that I have to follow to a point or I won’t be able to sleep. Firstly, I will have to use the bathroom. Then I have to make sure my mattress is perfectly aligned with the bed frame. After that, I have to make sure the curtains are completely closed so that not a single silver of light can penetrate it. I will literally get up 3-4 times to do it properly if it’s not done perfectly (or if I feel its not done perfectly). After that, I will have to drink just a sip of water. Then I will set up my pillows and stuffed animals, charge my phone and go to sleep. If I miss any one step or don’t do something properly, I will not be able to sleep (and yes this is proven).
3) My Gadgets Must Be Charged
I don’t know why but I always need my gadgets to have between 80%-100% of battery. I feel uncomfortable when they go below 80% and as far as possible I will keep them fully charged.
4) I Used To Be Depressed
When I was 14, I went through depression. It was never diagnosed because I never had the courage to tell anyone but I had all the signs. I went through a whole year of hell and as life started to look up, I started to get better. During that year of depression, I used to think a lot about killing myself. I had a plan and everything. I was very serious about wanting to die at one point and that was probably one of the lowest points in my life.
5) I Collect Stuffed Animals
I collect stuffed animals from around the world. I get my dad to buy me a stuffed animal every time he goes on a business trip or we go on holiday. I have toys from Paris to Australia. I actually have a lot. For a long time, I kept a log of when and where I got each animal. Recently I decided that I had to grow up. So I’ve stopped collecting basic stuffed animals but I still collect NICI animals because that’s my favourite brand and it’s a collector’s brand so I see no reason to stop that one.